Rejected by my Five Year Old

Parenting is tough. It is. And I’m the parent of just one five year old. Only one and she’s five. Yup, she’s a she… that makes it even tougher. I know she is only five however I work with students so I “know” (so I think) exactly what to expect when she’s 15. Oh, Goshhhhh! That’s only ten years away. Honestly I do NOT look forward to those teenage years. At five she runs to me and hugs me when I walk through the front door. I love that feeling! When she’s 15 she’ll be running away from me and into her bedroom … blah! Teens are just mean, angry, irritating, obnoxious, self-centered and those are the good ones. To be fair the teenage years are tough on students but they are just as tough on parents which make these earlier years that much more critical.

As moms and dads we need to reduce the busyness, families are just way to busy, and we need to parent intentionally. Busyness competes for our time to influence, instill our values and shape our children’s worldview. Being intentional can be difficult but it must be a priority. We must spend time on their turf doing the things they enjoy. Teens may reject your attempts however as parents we need to be proactive and consistent.

Several weeks’ back I attempted to do just that, be intentional, and I was flat out rejected by my five year old. I told my daughter I was going to visit her in school and bring McDonalds to have lunch together. I was excited and smiling when I told her however she did not share my excitement. She started crying! When I asked her what was wrong she said and I quote, “I want to have lunch with my friends.” Blah! I was R-E-J-E-C-T-E-D!!!!

My daughter is only five and she already picked her friends over me. That feeling sucked! But believe me I was NOT going to give up.

For the next several weeks I would remind her in several different ways how much I valued spending time with her and enjoyed her company and how special it was for me to hang out with her. I didn’t just say it, I showed her. To my surprise my wife tells me that my daughter told her that I was going to have lunch with her at school. I scheduled the lunch date immediately.

We had an amazing time. We chatted; laughed and played with the toy she received with her happy meal… it was a blast. It was special. I got to eat a double cheeseburger Most importantly, it was a reminder that the most important lunch meeting I could ever have is the one with my daughter. We should never be so busy to intentionally invest in the lives of our children. Sadly, I was the only dad out there.